Dear Friends,
I wanted to finish the year with a few shoutouts delivered in the form of a slightly off-kilter awards ceremony. Obviously, there are far more great Substacks that I’ve come across this year than can be acknowledged — but I really feel this is an amazing community/platform/whatever the hell it is and deserves celebration.
I have a piece up in UnHerd on Walt Whitman.
Very best,
Sam
THE SUBSTACKS…
Most Unexpectedly Demented
Sam Kriss
Consistently Funniest
Shalom Auslander
Honorable Mention:
Daniel Piper / Amran Gowrani
Pithiest
Gurwinder Bhogal
Most Erudite
John Pistelli / Naomi Kanakia
Most Life Affirming
Anne Kadet
Most Conspiratorial
John Carter
This is a hotly contested category — with JFK Facts, Michael Shellenberger, The Racket, and Seymour Hersh himself all deserving consideration. My nod went to Carter for the sheer nerviness and unpredictability of what he comes out with.
Most Deeply Affected by his Psychedelic Journey
Justin Smith-Ruiu
Honorable Mention:
Tao Lin
Filthiest
Aella
This was another hotly contested category, with Poneke Bunny’s oh-so-polite visit to a sex cage and Layla’s short stories coming in for consideration, not to mention that Brazilian describing his brothel visits, but in the end there was something about an ‘autistic slut’ with meticulously researched graphs of sexual preferences that tipped the scales.
Most Likely To Murder a Health Care Executive in Cold Blood
Luigi Mangione
As the music is playing in this wholly imaginary ceremony and Mangione is being perp-walked up the aisle to grasp his award between his manacled wrists, the announcer in his steady baritone claims that this is the first documented murder by a Substack account holder….since we never, I don’t think, actually found out what Coleman had been sent to prison for.
Most Involved Member of Substack Corporate
Mills Baker
Runner-Up
Hamish McKenzie
Best Publication (at least that I am personally involved with)
Persuasion
Really really. I keep something of an East Asian wall between my personal Substack and Persuasion, but it features several strong, smart articles every single week on a wide range of subject matter.
Most Enthrallingly Remote
Mary Gaitskill
Most Honorable Plutocrat
David Roberts
Most Simpatico with Castalia
Ross Barkan
I’m still sort of charmed by Eric Adams, but, other than that, I think I’ve agreed with Ross on everything.
Best Riddance
Jonathan M. Katz
Worthiest Adversary
Becca Rothfeld
Lifetime Achievement Award
Sherman Alexie / Ted Gioia
Best Line
“Substack is Only Fans for people who were in AP Lit.” - Katherine H.B.
My Peeps
And then all the people I can’t find an obvious category for but whose writing I look forward to every time:
Mary Tabor, Josh Dolezal, Eleanor Anstruther, Sean Sakamoto, Nikita Petrov, Felix Purat, Samuel Lopez-Barrantes, Sean McNulty, David Westbrook, Michael Mohr, Chris Jesu Lee, ARX-Han, Mo Diggs, BDM, Mary Jane Eyre, Daniel Oppenheimer, and many others.
Thank you! Again great company.
A friend wants to know what Layla's Substack handle is.
Thank you for my award. I always find that my chances of victory are greatly increased when I run unopposed.